There once was a time (seemingly long ago), when the world revolved around just my hubby and I. We spent our days in a comfortable routine of working and then coming home to each other to either prepare dinner or enjoy a night out on the town. Weekends were usually spontaneous, either working in our yard or garden, or spent on some trip or other or with friends at a football game or house party. It’s not that those days are over or long gone, but they’re certainly far and few between now that our four kids have come along. Here are my reasons I love alone time with my husband (and I hope they’ll make you think about why you love your alone time, too, or will inspire you to rekindle that time together):
1 – He’s fun and he’s funny, too!
Going out just the two of us gives me glimpses of our past before kids came along. Let’s be real…anyone who juggles a family, work, keeps house and plays chef, chauffeur, personal concierge and so much more, deserves a little one-on-one time with their significant other from time to time. It’s not that life, with all of its messes and ups and downs, the attitudes from the older kids, and the new discoveries and milestones with the littles isn’t good, but life pre-kids was pretty good, too. Living carefree enough to take spontaneous trips, go to concerts, and even something as simple as dinner and a movie…ah! Those were the days! Oh, and did I mention how much I loved sleep and miss it now? That’s another subject for another post…
2 – He gets me.
On days when my crew have either been at each other or me for one thing or another, he swoops in to help after a long and often trying day at work. He gets my frustrations and my joy, my occasional need for sarcasm, and even when I feel so crazy I can only laugh or cry (and sometimes both at the same time). He usually has a way of making it all disappear, if only temporarily. He knows my comfort zones and he often pushes those boundaries, forcing me to discover a part of me I never would have known. He is also the rock when I have dared try something new and have failed. He knows my dreams, he supports me as only he can, and he lets me know we’re part of something bigger than all of our kids put together. And that’s okay by me.
3 – I don’t have to try to make things work out.
I can go out on a date and enjoy a meal that I didn’t have to cook, and look at and have conversation with someone who’s pretty good looking, who isn’t going to stick his tongue out and yell “gross” when he doesn’t like what’s on his plate. He’s also not likely to roll his eyes at me when I say something with which he doesn’t agree. Oh, and I don’t have to clean up. What isn’t to love about any of that?!? Granted, we’ll likely talk mostly about the kids or the schedule for the upcoming week, but we’ll enjoy each other’s conversation and company without being interrupted to help wipe in the bathroom or to put a movie on or to get another snack, or…you get the gist!
4 – It reinforces our relationship.
Any time you have children (and a lot of them), it becomes near impossible for alone time at home. We have a pretty strict bedtime at our house, which gives us a little bit of time together each evening. We don’t have to set plans or go anywhere, but sometimes it’s nice to just lie together watching TV, enjoy a relaxing bath, or even eat dinner once the kids are dismissed from the table. No matter how busy things are, my husband is a priority in my life. He was who God intended for me to start a life and a family. I don’t take that lightly and cherish the time we have together alone. These kids are very much every waking moment and breath of our lives right now. It’s nice to know that when this stage of our lives has passed, we still have each other and won’t wake to each other as strangers living a life we never anticipated.
5 – I love how he makes me feel.
Yes, we have four kids (and we know how they got here), but we know how to prevent that from ever happening again! There was a time when sex was filled with the constant wondering and stress of producing a baby when things didn’t happen as naturally or as quickly as I had hoped. Now that we have all of the monkeys I had hoped for, sex and intimacy has become what it is supposed to be — pure, unadulterated enjoyment. With 15 years under our belt, he still makes me weak in the knees; he still excites me. Whether right or wrong, we’ve never let our kids in our bed (except for the occasional weekend cuddles); we’ve kept it reserved for us and our private time together. To be honest, our bed is one of my most favorite places to be in our home. It’s a place where I feel warm and comfy, where I can rest and relax, where I can share my most intimate moments with my husband, where I feel secure in his embrace.
In so many of these moments, everything is all about us. We are a couple constantly working to make time for each other and for strengthening our relationship as our children age and grow, as our jobs and other responsibilities make demands of us, and as the world around us continues to march on. I will cherish that for as long as I live…